My #1 networking tip
I kept patting the pocket on my suit jacket to make sure my business cards were still there. The incessant checking was just nerves -- I had given out approximately zero cards so there was no reason to believe they'd gone anywhere. I glanced around the room and felt overwhelmed. There were a few hundred people milling about at the cocktail hour before the awards dinner.
I was standing off to the side with some of my colleagues. We were supposed to be "networking," but we doing that thing where you instead look really busy trying to eat food standing up, and of course, act disinterested. This tactic only got us so far because all of a sudden, someone came striding directly towards us: The Senior Partner.
Uh oh.
I could tell by the look on his unhappy face that we were in for it. Our circle immediately parted and he stepped in, stating in an exasperated voice, "Go meet people!!! You're not here to talk to each other!!!" Core memory unlocked.
This was late 2006 or early 2007. I remember I was VERY early in my legal career and had signed up (or been "voluntold") to attend some bar association event. I had no idea what to do or how to act, so I stayed in my comfort zone. But that comment hit the mark. I marinated on it, and over time, I found my groove. It's now the basis for my current attitude about "networking," so here goes:
Networking is simply about meeting people. It's not about smiling blandly at the people you're seated with over a rubber chicken dinner, or exchanging business cards (or scanning LinkedIn QR codes) with them and never following up. That feels boring, forced, and like an obligation. Instead, shift your mindset and think about meeting someone new. Forget the elevator pitch for now. Some of my favorite openers? "Hi, I'm Jennifer Thibodaux," followed by:
"Is this your first time at this event?"
"What's your connection to the honoree/host/organization?"
"Are you here with any colleagues or flying solo?"
I promise you, any of these three questions will start an organic conversation. Your elevator pitch or explanation of what you do will inevitably come up. You'll also be more relaxed when you deliver it. And if it doesn't come up? Well, who cares?! You've met someone new and if you stay connected -- see my LinkedIn tips -- it will fall into place if and when the time is right.
Most importantly, one of the reasons I love meeting new people is so I can figure out how I can support them. I often ask them this point blank -- and then follow through. Sometimes, I realize that the person I've just met should absolutely meet someone else in my network and I connect them. Being a people connector is energizing and rewarding, but only works if you actually put yourself out there.
Who will you meet today?
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