Dear iPhone: It’s not you, it’s me

Dear iPhone,

Let me start by saying how much I love you! You’re always there when I need you, whether to capture precious moments on photo or video, check my email, look up random questions, read an e-book, indulge in social media, or, let’s face it, online shop. But…. you’ve probably noticed that I’m just not that into you anymore. So while this isn't really a break-up, it's definitely me taking a break. Let's call it a reset.

Gone are the days I used to pay attention to you in the moments immediately after I wake up while brushing my teeth.* As much as I enjoyed our early morning time together, I realized it was a false sense of enjoyment. When I turn to you for email and a social media check so early, I end up letting you dictate what’s on my mind rather than listening to what my mind has to say. I compromise my creative juices or get sucked into spending too much time with you. I wake up that early for “me” time, so to keep it that way, it can’t be “us” time. (And yes, too much time with someone can be a bad thing.)

Gone are the days I used to check every notification as soon as you pinged it to me. If you said “jump,” I’d pretty much say, “How high?!” No more. I felt like a Pavlov dog or a robot acting without thinking. Ugh, cringe. I’m sure you were surprised to see that I have a new “Focus” setting so you “Do Not Disturb” me – with limited exceptions – during the workday. Instead, I’m limiting your distractions so I can be present, focused, and efficient. I get to pick when I check in with you, not the other way around.

Gone are the days I used to keep you close by my side. I know you’re probably lonely sitting all the way across the room from me, way out of arm’s reach, during the workday. After all we’ve been through together, I owe you the truth: I’m just not my best self when you’re around. I’m left with no choice but to physically distance from you.

If it helps, it’s not you, it’s me. I want our time together to focus on the quality of our contact, not the quantity of contacts. I know these boundaries are new and difficult. But they’re for the best. The fact of the matter is, there is something else: me. And because you love me too, I know you’ll be proud of me for making these tough choices because you want what’s best for me too. You should be glad to hear that I’m happy, focused, present, and productive.

I hope you can respect that. Hey, don’t look at me like that . . . !

With love,
Jenn

* I recognize that many of us have jobs or personal circumstances that require us to check our phones immediately upon waking. I’m grateful that I no longer have to check work email and tend to any fires that were set ablaze over ight; I’m also grateful that my loved ones are safe and healthy.

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